Broken but Priceless Ministries
Follow Us:
  • Home
  • About Us
    • Broken but Priceless Ministries
    • Erin Elizabeth Austin
    • Josie Siler
    • Kathy Sebright
  • BLOG
    • Blog
    • Answers for Everyday Life
  • Magazine
    • The Magazine
    • Resources
  • Prayer
    • Request Prayer
    • Become a Prayer Partner
  • Events
  • Contact Us
    • Contact Erin!
    • Public Speaking

Dying to Live

8/6/2012

Comments

 
I'll never forget that day - the day I was told I would be dead in a year. Foolishly, I went to the doctor by myself. I knew I was sick, but I didn't think it was anything serious. Imagine my shock when the doctor told me my liver was inflamed and continually getting worse. Because of the lupus, my body was attacking my liver. Unbeknownst to me at the time, a person can't live without a liver. The doctors didn't know what to do, so I was told if my body didn't stop rejecting my liver, I would be dead in less than a year.

For the first twenty-four hours after that appointment, I was numb. A twenty-two year old isn't supposed to die because he or she is sick. Twenty-two year olds are supposed to graduate from college, get married, have kids, and live long, happy lives. Suffering isn't supposed to become a part of a person's life until he or she becomes elderly. In my mind, the doctor had simply made a mistake. I couldn't be as sick as he said. He read the tests wrong, or better yet, he had grabbed the wrong patient file and thought I was somebody else. Unfortunately, I could only live in denial for so long before the physical pain set-in. When this happened, I could no longer fool myself into believing I wasn't sick. The excruciating pain in my body demanded I accept the truth.
As pain wracked my body in such a way I didn't think possible, I finally understood a verse I had long heard but never truly understood. In Philippians 1:21, Paul says, "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." Until this moment, I couldn't understand how anyone could think dying would be a good thing. What is there to gain in death?

Like most young adults, I was dying to live. Death was a horrible prospect, and I didn't want to think about it. Yet the more diseased my liver became, the more I began to welcome death. Anything was better than the constant pain and nausea I had to endure. After awhile, I began begging God to either take away my pain or send me to Heaven. Neither one happened.

It was during this time God taught me an important lesson. Using the first part of Philippians 1:21, He helped me see I had been living for myself. Paul said, "for him to live is Christ." It could also be said that Paul was living for Christ, and Christ was seen by others because of how Paul chose to live. I couldn't say this about myself. Even though I went to church and had a daily devotion, I was living for myself. In that moment, I realized if I were to die in a year, my life wouldn't amount to much. I would be missed, but I wouldn't have made much of an impact on the lives of others.

From that day on, I have tried to live out the truth of Philippians 1:21. I want to live for Christ, and make an impact for His kingdom. What about you?

Are you dying to live? Is your life all about you, or is it all about God? The majority of people who read this understand they are on borrowed time. One can't live with a chronic illness without knowing this truth. So the question becomes, "What are you doing with the time you have left?" Can you honestly say, "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain?" I don't know about you, but this is my heart's cry. Will you join me?

"Alive, I'm Christ's messenger; dead, I'm His bounty. Life versus even more life! I can't lose. As long as I'm alive in this body, there is good work for me to do. If I had to choose right now, I hardly know which I'd choose. Hard choice! The desire to break camp here and be with Christ is powerful. Some days I can think of nothing better. But most days, because of what you are going through, I am sure that it's better for me to stick it out here. So I plan to be around awhile, companion to you as your growth and joy in this life of trusting God continues. You can start looking forward to a great reunion when I come visit you again. We'll be praising Christ, enjoying each other." ~ Philippians 1:21-26 (The Message)

(c) August 6, 2012
Comments
    Email Subscription

    Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.


    Picture
    Erin Elizabeth Austin

    Author

    Erin Elizabeth Austin is a writer and speaker with a passion to help people find healing in the midst of their brokenness.

    If you want to contact Erin directly please click here.


    Picture
    Josie Siler

    Contributor

    Josie Siler, like millions of others, is living with chronic illness. She is eager to share the hope and joy that she has found in Christ, whether that is in a church, at a women’s retreat, over a cup of hot cocoa, or through a blog post.
    Click here to email Josie.


    Archives

    November 2018
    October 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    April 2012
    March 2012
    January 2012
    December 2011

    Categories

    All
    A New Perspective
    Angry At God
    Believing God
    Discovering Joy
    Embracing Who God Created You To Be
    Fighting Feelings Of Low Self Worth
    Fighting Feelings Of Low Self-Worth
    Learning To Thrive
    Names Of God
    Overcoming Bitterness
    Prayer
    Questioning God's Goodness
    Questioning God's Love
    Rising Above The Pain
    The Armor Of God
    The Names Of God
    When Hope Is Lost


    RSS Feed

Website by Business Notes LLC --- Photo Credits: Josie Siler