Most people are familiar with a Bucket List. It’s a list of things you want to do before you “kick the bucket” or, put more plainly, die. I have a different kind of list. It’s a list of things that I am going to do when I am well, when I go into remission, when I am healed – or maybe just when I’m having a good day! Most of the things on my list are things that I used to love to do but am not able to do now. Do you want a peek at my list? Here are a few things:
Go on a long motorcycle trip
Roll down a hill
There are times when I think of the things on my list and I feel really sad. I feel a deep sorrow, and I grieve the life that I once had and the life that I thought I would have. I also praise the Lord because He meets me in my pain. He has blessed me and given me new dreams. I am doing things that I never thought I would be doing, and for that, I am so grateful. That being said, I do not think it is wrong to grieve. In fact, I think it is necessary. We won’t be able to move on with life unless we grieve what was lost.